They partly diagnose some of the dysfunctions of marriage, but their prescription that we should psychoanalyze the "candidates" (as if you can treat a good person that casually) and try to match ourselves based on some kind of psychological compatibility is nuts.
The reasons marriages are failing so much these days is that we live in a culture that does not value, or even understand, what marriage is. Marriage works when both partners treat it as a lifelong partnership and they work to overcome their problems. If you were to engineer a marriage between two people with perfectly matched personality types, phobias, etc, they'd still end up divorced in a few years if they've been taught to think of marriage as a temporary exchange of romantic favors "until I get bored" or "until something better comes along".
I too thought some of the prescriptions were a little strange, but I think the author brought it down to earth with:
We need a new set of criteria. We should wonder:
- how are they mad
- how can one raise children with them
- how can one develop together
- how can one remain friends
The reasons marriages are failing so much these days is that we live in a culture that does not value, or even understand, what marriage is. Marriage works when both partners treat it as a lifelong partnership and they work to overcome their problems. If you were to engineer a marriage between two people with perfectly matched personality types, phobias, etc, they'd still end up divorced in a few years if they've been taught to think of marriage as a temporary exchange of romantic favors "until I get bored" or "until something better comes along".