> I developed this hostile view of activities where everything is a calculated risk of how much time I need to put in versus what I am getting in return.
There is nothing wrong with providing value to society.
This is the old capitalism trope that everything that is valuable to society is profitable. It doesn't add up. Lots of things are terrible for society but profitable because they externalise all their costs (like collecting rubbish for a fee and dumping it into the sea). The opposite also applies.
There is nothing wrong with providing value to society.