Holy shit you just articulated all of the reasons that hackers value their knowledge - and the very important quality of never giving up. You search. You go on IRC. You get the source and compile it. You step aside and learn a tool better in isolation - then use it on your problem. You poke, prod, test. And your understanding begins to form, to conform to the shape of the problem, the map of what you know, what you've tried, what you have yet to try. You talk to others to fill in the important blank of what you don't know yet to try.

Because that story you told is abhorrant, even profane, but all too common.